the news.

the following is an email i sent out yesterday to friends/family...i realize i missed a few loved ones in that exchange...so here goes:

_______________________

Hello, friends.

I hope and pray you are doing well today as you read this email. I want to apologize for being MIA over the past few weeks. I know that I need to return several phone calls/emails. I ask for continued grace as I am now dealing with some difficult news/decisions.

As you know, this year is my intern year at the University of North Carolina- Chapel Hill. I have been spending this year training to become a full-fledged staff worker at my own campus next year. Around the middle of February, all of the interns for the region (VA, NC, SC) gathered in Chapel Hill for our placement meeting. We learned which campuses were open for new staff workers next year. We then gave our area directors and regional director information that they would need in regards to our circumstances for placement.

I, along with the other interns, waited for about 2 weeks to receive our "placement" phone calls. I received mine on Friday, March 2. I was offered a part-time position at a small private college in western North Carolina. I was offered part-time because of my estimated funding for next year and because of the limited funds at the college waiting for me.

After a week of extreme confusion/confliction, I was challenged to face the realities of my situation...especially financially. As of June of this year, I will no longer be on staff with InterVarsity. There are many factors that have played into this decision to say no. I was given an estimated budget for my part-time work next year, and I took a step back to realize that I will already be losing support as I enter next fall. I suppose I always knew this -- placement made me face this fact that I realistically do not have the resources to remain on staff. Do I believe God can provide for me again like He did last summer? Absolutely...but I don't feel released to enter into that enormous task again. I also want to say that the actual placement in and of itself is not entirely why I said no...afterall, I did tell my bosses that I would be willing to go anywhere....but even if I had been offered a full-time position at the "perfect" location, I would have eventually have had to face this reality about my support.

While the funding aspect of placement is certainly a large factor in my decision, it is not the only reason I am leaving. It's extremely hard to explain (especially in an email), but I did not have a peace in my spirit about working part-time/struggling to raise support over the next few years in hopes of becoming full-time. I also feel a strong pull in my spirit to seek a community of my own and I am looking forward to becoming strongly connected to a church family. As much as I desire to remain on staff, I know the Lord is leading me away for something else.

God has been faithful to me over this past week to affirm me and my giftings...especially in the area of staff work. I've spoken with several people over this past week -- people who have a strong, spiritual voice in my life. No one convinced me one way or the other...and I never heard some big, booming voice from Heaven telling me what to do. When it came down to it, I had to pay attention to my heart/spirit...even if I am still confused and hurting.

I pray that you trust my decision. I pray that you understand that this decision was not made out of fear or doubt. I pray that, no matter what you think of me leaving, you will continue to stand beside me. I cannot fully explain how difficult this decision has been for me. I am grieving...and anxious about where God is calling me for next year. I have enormous love for InterVarsity and its work on the college campus. I don't have a back-up plan. I have no idea what I am going to do or how I will continue ministry...

...but I do know that He is faithful. I do know that this year has been incredible in more ways than I can outline...and no one can take away the miracle God gave me to get me here for the year. I know this whole year and process is not a mistake...and I thank Jesus for giving me you all to stand beside me in this process.

I also ask that you pray for all of the other interns in our region who are dealing with their own placement decisions/news. This is an intense time of year for us on staff (finishing out the semester, preparing for our Chapter Camp in May and looking ahead to next year). I am faithful that you all will continue to pray for us and our campuses.

If you have any questions about any of this, please feel free to email or call and I will try to get back to you as soon as I can. Again, I apologize for being hard to reach recently.

For those of you who are currently supporting me financially, I will send out a letter explaining how to continue giving until the end of the fiscal year (June) and other information you may need as I finish this year on staff. Thank you for your continued support and encouragement.

Thank you for loving me...for praying for me...and for encouraging me. I am incredibly blessed by you all and I will be praying for you in the weeks to come.

In His Grace,
Laura